"Don't take this personally but..."

 You know when you hear those words you are in trouble. You brace your stomach as if  punch is coming. Words are powerful things. Sometimes people don't realize it. Maybe they thinking for a long time about what they thought would be very helpful for you, or they are speaking out of the emotion of the moment. The challenge facing each one is simply- what are you going to do now?

Words that are hard to "stomach" come to everyone. It is hard to not take it personally. If you are one who is really good at that, well.... hats off to you. I find it hard. I think many people do.

There are some hard truths that need to be spoken. If we are doing or have done something wrong and are unaware of it, we need to hear it. Perhaps something that was said was not received well. Now you bear the fruit of those words. It is good to know the truth and deal with it. Face it, feel it and deal with it. Still not easy, but easier to deal in truth when you can see their point then when you cannot.

It is in the times when you fail to see their point , when they have their facts wrong or it seemed to come out of nowhere. This is when it is particularly tough. 

Regardless of the situation, some kind of a response is needed. It is natural to want to speak back. Sometimes that is what needs to happen. Especially if they have been misinformed. If you can do it calmly then it is a good idea. If you are boiling, you may want to wait a bit. Words spoken when the blood in our viens is "boiling" does not always guarantee the best response. 

When the person says those famos " Don't take this personally" you need to consider that also. Why are they saying at all? Is there anything I need to learn here? 

At times like this, I am better off going home and thinking for awhile. Psalm 37:3-8 is my go-to Psalm at times like these. I think the advice of the Psalmist is good and worthy of consideration. 

Many times, it is God who will ultimately be my defender. Sometimes you just have to take those hard words and leave them with God. Defending yourself just doesn't always work. Hearing the person out(hopefully they don't go on and on), is good. If you listen well, it should mean they will give to you the same courtesy if you do say something. Remember though, saying " thank you I will take your words into consideration" and ending it there is not a bad idea. 

Go, think and pray. God will give you wisdom and still your trembling heart. Read Psalm 37. It really is a great Psalm with some solid advice that has proven true many time in my life and the lives of many others.