“He who answers before listening - that is his folly and shame.” Proverbs 18;13
Who among us have not spoken too quickly? Perhaps we were anxious, nervous or in a rush. We assume we already know what they are going to say and rush to respond. The end result is the same. Our words end up making no sense and are wasted; simply unhelpful. We try to pull them back but that is a little like backing up a long train once it has left the station.
Not only are we left feeling, and perhaps looking, a bit foolish. We also convey a message to the one whom we have interrupted that we don’t have time to hear them out. I have done this as a parent, or a spouse and as a friend. It grieves me when I think about it, if I am to be honest.
Years ago, I read a very good book called “Margin”. One of the helpful pieces of advice I read there was to always remember, – “no one is as interested in what you have to say as you.”
I have discovered that if I keep this truth in mind, I become a better listener and can be more present as people talk.
Listening to people is a principal which the Scriptures teach; “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” Romans 12:10 One of the greatest ways we honor one another is by taking time to listen to them. The other side of this coin is knowing when we have said enough. I think it perhaps takes time to learn this, but people can only listen so long, and we have to know when enough is enough! To honor people is not just listening to them but also knowing when it is time to be the listener, if we have been the talker!
Lastly this principal has no age limit on it; whether we are listening to children or aging parents, friends, or employers. Putting on patience and kindness has a way of ushering in the opportunity to be better listeners.
Dear Father,
Thank you for your patience with me as I pray and talk over all kinds of things with you. I ask that in this next week you will give me the wisdom and patience to listen well and be slow to speak and quick to listen.
In Jesus Name,
Amen